Drowning In My Dream
by Yui Miyamoto
Summary: Kamui has a disturbing nightmare and is comforted by Subaru at the end of it.


Disclaimer: X is Clamp's and not Yui's.  
  
  
Instead of closing my eyes, they opened wider in shock.  
  
The impact was too much.  
  
Like a wine glass cup falling in suspended time,   
I watched myself so carefully  
Only to bleed so profusely.  
Without care, without discretion...  
  
  
Drowning in My Dream  
by Miyamoto Yui  
  
  
"I need to breathe.  
  
Fuuma...  
I need to breathe...  
  
Stop...  
  
YAMERO, FUUMA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"  
  
There was no in the house, but my screaming was as tight as a bell's ringing.  
Rising abruptly from my bed, I looked around paronoid as if someone were going to kill me. On my guard, my eyes became slits like a snake ready to attack its prey.  
  
But to my slight disappointment, there was no one.  
  
No one at all...  
  
"Ahh!" I patted my hand upon my left eye. And then, I breathed a sigh of relief.  
  
"What is your wish?" my mother's voice suddenly protruded inside of my head.  
  
Shaking my head a bit, I took off my hand only to find blood on it. Rushing to the bathroom, I washed it thoroughly only to find that it was only my nose.  
Because of my disturbing dream, my temperature had risen. At least now, I wasn't coughing as much as I was when I woke up.  
  
As I washed my face with cold water, there was an image of Kotori on the mirror in front of me.  
"Kotori..." I mumbled.  
Touching the mirror, the reflection put her hand as if it could touch my own. In its warmth, I had lived all this time. And without her, I was decaying...living in even more constant danger now that the one who had sworn to protect me...  
...would only turn out to be the one that hurt me the most by taking that of which was most valuable than my life.  
  
"What do you want?" Kotori's lips said to me.  
  
I want to be left alone I want to be where you are I want to live my own life I want to see you again I want to not make this choice I want you to be here where I am I want to live a normal life I want to live until I am old with you I want to bring him back to me...  
  
I want to live where there is no betrayal   
  
Her eyes looked down and tears began to come out of her eyes.  
  
Pressing my hands to the cold glass surface, I leaned closer saying, "No, don't cry Kotori."  
  
She shook her head.  
  
"No, don't cry Kotori," I begged. "I promised..."  
  
Pat, pat.  
I began to lightly pound on the glass mirror saying, "I don't want you to cry. I don't want you to be sad."  
Like a child, I just want to hold you so easily...  
  
I remember the first time that you hugged me. You jumped on me with a big smile and said, "Kotori no tomodachi ni naru!!"  
Though I was blushing like crazy, Fuuma held his hands out because you were not supposed to that to a guest; and even more so, I was a boy.  
  
Poundpoundpound...  
I mumbled to myself softly:  
Running for your life...  
For the perfect dream...  
Drowning in my dream...  
  
  
Before I hit the glass hard enough to break it, my reflection suddenly reappeared in the mirror.  
  
Crash!!  
  
As I knelt to the floor I cupped both of my ears with my bleeding hands. The glass shards that had flew through the air as if in slow motion struck me like sword tips scratching slightly on my skin.  
  
Shaking my head, I began to cry.  
And then, I gasped in pain. "AAAHHHH!"  
  
AH! My eye is burning. As I clasped my eye with my left hand, I knew it was pointless and then, I got up to look at myself in the mirror.  
  
Drip, drip.  
  
My left eye had been hit by a tiny glass shard.  
  
Staring at the mirror, I remembered that awful dream just now...  
  
"Whatever is yours, I'll take it from you, Kamui." Fuuma had said as he held my waist and began to lean forward to kiss me on the lips.  
Pushing him away, I clenched my hands to raise my aura.  
  
But he did it anyway as he began to kiss my neck. "I missed you very much, Kamui."  
  
Then, he stepped away from me as I glared icily at him. "Just leave me alone, Fuuma."  
  
"And what are you going to do about it, Kamui?" He said as he pushed up his grasshopper glasses and crossed his arms with his trenchcoat waving in the wind.  
  
"I-"  
  
"No no no." He raised his hand up and shook his head. "Before you say that, you should see what I have."  
  
It was then that out of the dark shadows, a hooded person stepped out from behind him...  
  
taking off his hood, I saw the face and became a frozen block of flesh.  
My reserve had drained from my skin. And the shock was so great that I became so numb and could not hear anything though Fuuma was mumbling something in a language that wouldn't come through into my head.  
  
My strength had depleted to thin air.  
  
And that's when my mind screamed, "Stop Fuumaaa!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"  
  
Regarding myself in the mirror, I couldn't feel anything. I couldn't feel any more pain as I looked at my right eye bleeding.  
  
It was then that the blood and water in my eyes intermingled and fell to the ground after caressing my cheek so warmly.  
  
"Kamui...Kamui..." a voice whispered softly.  
I looked up to see Subaru touching my cheek and leaning closer to look into my eyes.   
We both stared at each other until I dropped all my reserve and grabbed his collar and then wrapped my arms around him.   
  
"What happened?" he said as he placed his hands on my back and on the top of my head.  
  
You should understand how I feel...  
I hope that this dream wasn't true...  
  
You wouldn't betray me, would you Subaru?  
  
Subaru...  
Why is your body is so cold?  
  
But as I gazed at those green eyes that had seen pain and never imagined his fate to be more twisted than anything imaginable...  
  
It took me such a long time. But I found it, Kotori...  
  
  
This was what I had wanted to protect all this time.  
It was more than you, Kotori...  
  
This is my true wish...  
  
I whispered without crying,   
"I want everything to be the way it used to be."  
  
But as I looked around and into those trusting green eyes, somehow, I knew there was something definitely wrong.  
  
I'm not so sure anymore...  
  
--  
Author's note: This just popped out of nowhere. I was listening to Ex Dream again...woohoo I'm getting the single! 


End file.
